Recently it has been bothering me that my hair had turned kind of a blah brown, so I went to the store and bought magic shampoo. This shampoo promised to bring life back into my hair. It was going to reveal the color and highlights that had been beaten down. About a month into using it, I realized that it had in fact brought out my natural color. It was shiny and healthy, just as promised. What I didn't count on was finding out that my natural color, hidden under that brassy haze of styling products and life's mess, wasn't the brown of my youth, it was gray . Let's not say gray. Let's go with silver. Silver sounds more exciting. Rocky tells me that God and I are the only ones who would notice the higher number. He loves me and tends to say things like that to keep me from being neurotic. It seems especially obvious around my crown. My first thought was a bit of dread. I don't want to start coloring my hair. I'm cheap, hate going to have my hair done, and don't trust myself to handle it at home. But, women who aren't 50 yet have to dye their hair, right? The funny thing is, the more I looked, the more I liked them. Those silver strands proving my maturity. They kind of sparkle in the right light. I don't want to cover up a natural sparkling silver crown! I'm sure I might one day change my mind, especially if the sparkle starts to dominate, but for now, I'm kind of loving the glimpses of silver here and there.
I was thinking about this at church Sunday. Our church is going to have a revival in October, and for the time leading up to it, our pastor has asked us to pray about renewal twice a day for 4 minutes each time. That is spending 8 minutes a day for a whole month inviting God to reveal our true color. Much like my hair discovery, my first reaction was a bit of dread. This kind of renewing isn't always smooth. Sometimes God uncovers something we didn't know was there. That can be hard or even painful, but sometimes that pain is of our own making.
I was thinking about this at church Sunday. Our church is going to have a revival in October, and for the time leading up to it, our pastor has asked us to pray about renewal twice a day for 4 minutes each time. That is spending 8 minutes a day for a whole month inviting God to reveal our true color. Much like my hair discovery, my first reaction was a bit of dread. This kind of renewing isn't always smooth. Sometimes God uncovers something we didn't know was there. That can be hard or even painful, but sometimes that pain is of our own making.
In 2 Samuel 9, we read the story of Mephibosheth (ma-fib-o-sheth) who hid out in a terrible place trying to avoid David because he thought David would hurt him. When David did catch up to him, he invited him to his table like one of his own sons. In case you didn't know, David was the king of pretty much everything awesome at the time. Mephibosheth was even lame because of trying to hide. All that pain and suffering to just avoid getting treated like a prince. I'd like to not repeat his mistake.
So, with Mephibosheth in mind, I quote Psalms 139: 23 & 24
"Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life."
One other verse that I am playing on repeat during this is the always encouraging Jeremiah 29:11. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." God loves us and tends to say things like that to keep us from being neurotic.