Tuesday, January 24, 2012

A Political Update

      Since my post about the online piracy legislation, it has been semi-killed, meaning they reserve the right to tweak it and push it through at another time when the world isn't paying as much attention. There are still 56 members of Congress that have their names attached to either SOPA or PIPA. Here is a handy website listing those people.
       Like a good little voter, I researched where the people in my district stood and wrote letters. The bad news is that I had to write two letters expressing disappointment. Both of my senators, Saxby Chambliss and Johnny Isakson were cosponsors. The day after the protests, Chambliss pulled his name from the bill and sent me a form letter letting me know that he had come to understand that it was flawed and not going to fix the intended problem (score one for the protest. Isakson, however, is still attached and sent me a form email with the same old line of how it will only effect foreign websites. It made me mad, not because I am so wrapped up in this particular bill, but because it shows a lack of understanding about the modern world, the people in it, and also because I looked at the amount of money his campaign received from the entertainment industry.
     On to the good news. My congressman, Tom Graves, was against it before it was popular to be against it. I wrote him an encouragement email thanking him for taking the time to understand the repercussions. He also sent me a form email in reply. Here is the good part of what it said.
            "While I believe it is essential that U.S. copyright laws are upheld, this should not come at the expense of technological innovation that should be encouraged, and not prematurely stifled. I also have concerns that in today's rapidly changing Internet, individuals who willingly violate U.S. copyright law will find new technology to commit these acts at a much faster pace, only making SOPA ineffective in eliminating copyright infringement.
             More importantly, each American's right to free speech under the First Amendment of the U.S. Constitution must be protected, and I believe SOPA's sweeping authority to block websites, as we see in China, encroaches upon that right and sets a dangerously precedent."
Wow! It's like he actually read the bill or something. Imagine that.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

My Day Offline

I spent yesterday offline. It was not easy. At times, it was down right frustrating. In addition to the SOPA issue, I've been seeing all these articles about internet addiction, and it had me curious.
I should note that I did allow myself 3 email checks spaced out through the day since it is the way teachers and some other important people primarily communicate with me. I checked for important messages and left the rest. This taught me that I get way too many junk emails that I need to unsubscribe from. I guess since they usually trickle in through the day, I never noticed how many there were.
I also found out that I have gotten really use to having knowledge at my fingertips at all times. Several times I had to resist the urge to ask Rocky something, knowing he'd look it up online. Someone called me and asked me a question that I had to answer with, "I don't know." That one hurt. I knew how to find out, I could have answered the question in 30 seconds or less, but it involved the internet, so I had to let someone else do the search. The answer was the first thing I looked up this morning when I went back online. Easter is April 8th this year, just in case you were wondering.
The strangest part of going offline was how isolated I felt. I talked to people on the phone, I was even face to face social with a few people, but still I felt like there was a wall between me and the rest of the world. I'm not sure how I feel about that. It was an unexpected weird sort of anxiety. I think it was that anxiety that kept me from being more productive. I had thought that going offline for the day would increase the time I had to do other things, but it really didn't.
All in all, I am very glad I did it. I do think I will do it again soon. I also think I need to curb daily usage a bit. I'm going to continue to limit the number of times I check my email, and turn off my phone alerts. It has been an enlightening experiment.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

SOPA Explained (sort of)

If you read many blogs or follow any blogger types on twitter or are just a fan of the internet, then you may have heard some rumblings about something called "SOPA". That stands for "Stop Online Piracy Act". The name sounds fantastic. I work for a photographer who has to deal with piracy. Ending it would make life easier. After all, are we all against internet theft? Of course we are. But wait!
When was the last time our government came up with a simple direct answer to a problem with no unintended bad consequences? Yeah. That is kind of what I figured. So, I went digging for information. It wasn't easy finding an even handed article explaining what SOPA is. This one at CNET was the best I could find. It is at least the clearest one I have read.
I read the whole thing and gleaned a few things out of it, and then I asked Rocky what the rest of it meant. He started on a list of "simple" ways that he could get around it all. I understood none of what he said.
This is what it boils down to. If you read the article and understand it all then you probably know ways around each and every road block they want to throw at you. If you read the article, your eyes kind of glaze over, and you are pretty sure that some of those words have been made up to confuse you, then the internet as you know it will end, or at least get a lot more complicated. In addition to that, there is wording in this that not only encourages your internet provider to track your usage, it requires them to monitor it. Because it is so broad in the wording, one person could post a YouTube clip on Facebook that is not licensed and not only would that person get shut down, but YouTube and Facebook as a whole could get shut down. People who support the bill reply with, "They wouldn't do that. It is an extreme example to scare people. To that I say, yes it is an extreme example meant to scare, but that doesn't mean it isn't true. The federal government will be given the legal authority to do that. Whether or not they exercise that power is not the point. The point is that instead of stopping piracy, this bill will become the first big step in United States internet censorship.
I think it is important to mention that this is not a Republican or Democrat thing. This is one of the most bipartisan bills on the floor right now. It is also contested by both sides. I encourage you to read the article I linked to. Hunt for what you understand and judge for yourself.
Next Wednesday several websites will be going dark in protest of the bill. Don't panic! They will be back Thursday.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Select-a-Frustration

I'm doing some holiday baking today which means my kitchen is a mess and also that I don't care because the whole house smells like pie. While I was doing this baking burned through the paper towel roll in the kitchen. I replaced it, went to grab one, and pulled off only half a sheet. This means that I have once again accidentally bought the select-a-size paper towels. I hate these. Who needs half a paper towel? (that's rhetorical because at this moment, I really don't care)
This situation calls for a carefully worded complaint letter!
Here is the exact wording of the email from me that someone at P&G is going to read:

I'd like to suggest that you make your select-a-size labels a little more obvious. I know there are probably houses in America that only make half a mess at a time, but mine is just not one of those houses. Sadly, having this type of house tends to make one distracted a lot, especially when shopping. I can not count the number of times I have gone to grab one of your wonderfully absorbent paper towels only to pull off half a sheet and get that feeling of dread knowing that for the next month (I buy in bulk) I will be groaning in frustration every time I reach for a paper towel. The little blue strip and circle are just not cutting it for me. I need a big red bold print warning label. Flashing lights or a special code so that the clerk asks if I’m sure I want select-a-size would be great, but that might be asking too much. For now, I'll settle for a larger logo.

Thanks!
It has been my experience that P&G is very open to costumer ideas. With any luck we will all be seeing Bounty labels with neon colors and flashing lights in the stores before next year's Christmas baking season.
By the way, if any of my friends out there are only half messy, I'd be willing to work out a trade. I have 15 rolls of aggravation left.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

In the Short Run

On the way to church this week, Rocky started commenting on a sticker on the car in front of us. It was one of the 13.1 stickers you get if you run a half marathon. Items with that logo have been popping up everywhere lately. Rocky felt that they were kind of obnoxious, to which I, being a loving wife said, "That is only because neither of us can run even half that." This is the moment the light bulb went off  and lead to me making my own Zazzle store called Rixie Designs.
You know how these days everyone gets a trophy? (I'll skip over how that practice has lead to the "occupy" movement) Well, shouldn't we all get a sticker? After my recent failed attempt to take up running, I found myself envying those who could run through a whole 5k as well as people who earn the 13.1 stickers. Then I got to thinking that I am probably not alone in this. In fact, I bet that close to 99% of people (outside of Kenya) will never run a marathon. Why should the 1% get all the cool stickers?

Before you take me too seriously or think I'm knocking runners, I want to assure you that I am mostly poking fun at myself and my inability to jog.
I only make 10% on sales here, so it's not exactly a money maker idea, but it made me laugh and it was something that I thought should be out there.
I added text to the coffee mug that says, "I only run for coffee" (I may change it to say "I only go on coffee runs") and the back of the shirt design says, "If I'm running then something is chasing me and you should probably try to keep up".
I have a new line that will be posting soon for those of you who want one of those cool initial destination sticker, but are slightly agoraphobic.
"Home Sweet Home"

Normally I don't post anything worth saying this on, but since I'm putting this in a real shop this time, I'm asking everyone to please not take my idea. Email me if you want to use the design. There is a good chance I'll say yes and even help you out. Just ask first.  

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

Distraction Crafting

I have too much to do so, naturally, I fix this by adding random, pointless craft projects to the list. It is actually not as crazy as it sounds. Quick and easy projects are a big stress reliever for me. Like many, many others, I have gotten sucked into Pinterest (shoot me a message if you want an invite). There are tons of great ideas on that site. These are a couple I've tried out.
This is my first fabric flower. I made it with scraps I had around. I had a little too much fun burning the fabric. Here is a link to the how-to. I can't wait to make one out of something other than what is rolling around the bottom of my craft drawer.

This is my second flower. I'm really excited about it because it turned out perfect on the first try. I did buy some jersey fabric to try this out, but only 1/4 of a yard, and that will make several more. Here is the link to this how-to. It is from the same site as the other flower. She has several easy and cute craft projects on her site.
I've started a board on my pinterest account just for things I've made (a couple of things from my dad). If you want to follow me there, I go by Rixie Dotson there.

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

A Little Too Clean

Several months ago, we had a bee in the house. I keep hearing stories begging people not to kill bees if at all possible. This bee was making it very hard. We used the vacuum to suck him up. There is an old joke about nothing being able to live in a vacuum (an old nerdy joke), but bees haven't heard that before and so the little guy was buzzing around inside. We were afraid he might be mad, so we took the whole thing outside, opened it up, and ran. Ten minutes later. There was a crack of thunder and a sudden downpour with the vacuum still on the patio. We got it in the garage, took apart the pieces that could be taken apart, and let it dry. I was shocked to see it still worked, but the smell coming out of it was awful. I set about disinfecting and replacing filters. Unfortunately, the only replacement filter we could find was a Febreeze filter. If you have ever been to my home then you know I aim for a smell free house. Scents bother all of us. I get a headache, Rocky starts to wheeze, and the kids just complain a lot. The only thing you will regularly smell in my house is food cooking.
I bring this story up because I had to vacuum today and now my head is killing me. I know to a normal person would love to deodorize a room while they vacuumed, but not me.
Just further proof that house work can in fact kill you.

Sunday, December 04, 2011

Just Enough Rope

If you are a Facebook friend, then you probably already know what kind of week we've had. For others, I'll catch you up quickly. This week my daughter got tangled up in a jump rope in PE and then this happened
It is a severe sprain in her ligament which caused two chips in her bone. She can no longer dance in The Nutcracker this year, which has been a source of more pain than the break itself. She is handling the disappointment fairly well and has agreed to be a stagehand. Meanwhile, the rest of us are still in the cast. Now JD will be the family star as he plays Fritz.
Speaking of JD, last week he left two of his favorite stuffed puppies at my parent's house. Brownie and SeƱior Bunny Ears, are having a great time without him according to this picture that my dad made.
They had a little snow, so my mother made the puppies matching plaid blanket coats and my dad helped them build a snowman. I think I'm going to have to frame this for JD's room.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The 840 Adventure

First of all, let me start by saying that driving from West Tennessee to North Georgia on the Sunday after Thanksgiving is a giant pain, especially when it rains the entire trip. It took 9 hours instead of 6. Someone asked me what time we got home and I replied, "I don't know, I just know it was really late." Then Rocky pointed out that we were home by 7, it only felt like 2 in the morning.
The one high point of the trip was that we decided to take the unfinished I-840 loop instead of driving through Nashville (smartest thing we did all day). They have only been building this road since we moved to GA 10 years ago, and it still isn't done, but I digress. The day before, my aunt and uncle had done a test run for us and sent back direction. This was extremely helpful because after 840 stops there are absolutely no directions pointing you to how to get back on. There aren't even hints of where to go. State highways are not marked, and good luck getting a data signal strong enough to get gps. This is probably why there wasn't another car in sight for miles.
When we first started thinking of taking this path I looked it up on Google maps. It looked like a large stretch of the road was newly completed, which would make the drive a piece of cake. It was going to be 2 or 3 turns on major roads. What Google doesn't tell you is that although the road is complete, the exits are not, and they will dump you in the middle of nowhere with no warning.
It took use exactly 1 hour to go from one side to the other. This means we loss no time and didn't have to drive through Nashville in the rain (win!). We also got to drive through the extremely cute town of Leiper's Fork where a bunch of the country music folks live (and live very well, I might add).
The drive was pretty, it was different scenery, and we got to see the castle, which always makes me smile. Who builds a castle in the middle of Tennessee? You may recognize it from the Taylor Swift video "Love Story" (they still make music videos? huh).

Anyway, to sum up, interstate traffic, bad; bypass, need directions but good; music videos, still made

*additional info
here is the video, and the castle is in there a good bit. It's a cute song, but I can't help but wonder if she has ever read Romeo and Juliet or The Scarlet Letter (I do not think it means what she thinks it means).

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Harsh Words For Black Friday

Fair warning, I'm not a fan of what Black Friday has become. If you are of the opinion that it is good fun and great deals then you may want to stop reading now.
I've worked retail during Thanksgiving and actually enjoyed the crazy pace of the day after, but that was before the early openings and lines around the building. I understand the history of the day. It is, or was, the kick off to the Christmas shopping season. It marked the day that retailers started turning a profit for the year (hence the "black"), but you probably already knew this.
I feel like they are sucking all of the fun out of Thanksgiving, and even stealing joy from Christmas. When you go into the stores right now you will not see Thanksgiving decoration unless they are in the clearance section. I really think that if our country wasn't so attached to the food we eat on Thursday then there would be a bigger push to start sales then. After all, it isn't very politically correct to stop in the middle of the week and be thankful to God for the blessings of the year, but frying a turkey and opening a can of gelled cranberries is sacred in the U.S.
A few years ago I did wake up early to see what I was missing. We drove past Best Buy and saw people in a line wrapped around the building. There were hundreds of people waiting for something the store had maybe 6 of. We went into Walmart where there were even more people waiting with police guards standing buy. The clerks had a palette with the cheap giant t.v.s stacked up waiting to be grabbed. They were standing on the counters so that they wouldn't get run down when the sale started. The frenzy and mood of the crowd was frightening. I was glad I was standing back and not there for any of the special items.
There is no Christmas cheer in this bunch. It brings out the worst in people and greed rules the day instead of grace. The stories of theft, violence, and just plain meanness makes me sad. I miss it being a fun day where part of the family watched football and the others went out on a nice shopping trip. I may go out on Black Friday, but it won't be before lunch. I will not be playing the game no matter what unbelievable deal is in the paper Thursday. No amount of discount is worth that scene to me.
I tend to get a little irritated thinking about the number of people standing in line for hours in the cold on a holiday, knowing that most of these people won't stand in line for ten minutes, inside, in order to vote. I suppose we could offer people a chance to buy a computer or television for $100 at the polls, but then again maybe it's best that not everyone votes.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Not My Family

It has been a while since I have fired off a good complaint letter. I hardly ever get a reply that isn't a form letter, but it makes me feel better to say my peace.
Today's "hate" mail is due to the advertising shown during ABC Family's Harry Potter Weekend. In all fairness, some commercials come from your cable or sat. provider and my not be their fault, but given their track record, I thought a reminder of the "family"part of their channel was overdue regardless.
Here is what I sent:

"I'm not entirely sure you are to blame for this issue, but I want to cover my bases. It is in regards to advertising aired.
My family and I were enjoying your Harry Potter weekend right up until a semi pornographic commercial aired for Lifetime Movie Network. It turned our nice Sunday afternoon into a sex-ed class for our 7 year old. I know that my definition of "family" often varies from yours, but it never occurred to me that I'd have to worry about that during Harry Potter.
I own the Harry Potter movies and can easily watch them in my DVD player instead of on your channel. If the advertising continues to be R rated I will be forced to block you just like I block LMN.
In short, I'm recommending more Crayola and less under garments, more Nintendo and less casual sex, more family and less making babies."
I'm actually looking forward to the day when televisions customize your advertising like Facebook does. I know a lot of people see it as an invasion of privacy to have your trends tracked, but I rather enjoy seeing less ads for things I don't need. I also like to mess with it by occasionally posting things like "monkey herding" just to see what the computers come up with for me.
Wouldn't it be great if ABC Family had to change their name due to truth in advertising? But then what would they be? "ABC marketed to teenagers but horribly inappropriate and actually watched by middle aged housewives" is just too long.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

LL Cool JD

Did you know that LL Cool J actually stands for "Ladies Love Cool James"? I bring this up because of my title. My 7 year old son has more game than most guys who are 27, and I'm not exactly sure how it happened. Girls get all giggly around him. I'm not just talking about little girls his age either. Young, old, and in between, he has them all enchanted. My mom suggested I could write a book entitled "Raising Prince Charming". She might be on to something.
This week he has a 7 year old stalker of sorts. She realized where we live while trick or treating Halloween. Then we ran into her at a restaurant. This week she gave JD her number and told him to call to arrange a play date. (not on my watch!) What tickled me most was that JD doesn't have a clue that this little girl is after him. Her giggling, blushing, and batting eyelashes say otherwise.
I've been trying to figure out what he has that is so different, and a few things have popped out at me.
1. He has an older sister which means he isn't afraid to talk to girls, knows what girls are interested in, and has an insight some men never get
2. Rocky is complimentary of me, and JD has picked this up. He knows when a woman is dressed up, and says so. He is quick to say, "You look nice today" or that he likes your new hairstyle. As he gets older, he is also good about not saying what he doesn't like.
3. He has a great sense of humor. I know people don't usually mean it when they say they look for a sense of humor first, but even if it isn't first on the list, it is still on the list. He isn't a class clown type, or a joke a minute guy, he is just witty and quick and off the cuff funny.
4. He is adorable. Those big eyes and extra long dark eyelashes just melt your heart. I've had strangers stop me to comment on his eyelashes since he was born. I think they may have some sort of magical properties. I know I can't look him in the eye when he is in trouble. If I did, he'd never get punished.

We are going to have to work hard to teach him respect for women and restraint, or 10 years from now we are going to be in serious trouble. Let me just go ahead and apologize in advance to all of you out there with daughters who will one day be charmed by my prince. We are doing our best, but I can't help but think that hearts will be broken over those magic eyes of his.

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

Thankful in ALL things

"In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
I Thessalonians 5:18

Last year I challenged my friends to be creative when listing the things they are thankful for in November. Here is the original post Randomly Thankful. It was a huge success from where I sat. Not only did it challenge me to find the smaller joys in life, it also helped me know my friends better, and find common links we didn't know we had.
Make no mistake, I am extremely thankful for the big things. My salvation through Christ, my husband and children, household employment is a big one this year, and the family and friends I have are an enormous blessing. I can not possibly be thankful enough for these things, but they are also the things I remember to be thankful for year round.
I wanted to explain this because from the surface, my Facebook status posts might seem trivial or mocking, but I am honestly searching my life for little things that come my way that I should be thankful for. When you see my posts you can be sure that no matter how silly it might seem, it is something that I have actually stopped my day to thank God for putting in my path.
When I read over the Bible verse at the top, something struck me. God never promises us that we will have a happy life, but He does wish for us to be happy with our life even when others can't see reason for it. It is the will of God that we find something to be thankful for no matter what is going on. Some days it is easy to find things, and others it might come down to being thankful that the day is over.
Once again, I am challenging myself (and you, if you'd like) to be thankful for something different. Something you don't usually take the time to realize as a blessing. If you are on Facebook, then use your status and spread the fun.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Lesson From Running

As you may know, I have been trying the Couch to 5K running program. I have learned a lot about myself during this experience, and I thought I'd share.
1. I am very much out of shape and in bad need of some sort of exercise.
2. I know how to walk, I know how to run, I do not know how to jog. It is a weird gate at a weird pace for me.
3. I freckle quickly when I spend 30 minutes outside 3 times a week.
4. Everything in my town is up hill both going and coming. I don't know how it is possible, but it is true.
5. I'm a wimp when it comes to foot pain. My tendons flare, my summer foot injury throbs, and I had no idea the muscles in your foot could hurt.
6. 5k to Couch is a lot easier and takes days instead of weeks.
I stuck it out longer than I thought I would and although my group is still going, I think I am bowing out. I've had nasty sickness, house guests, work projects, travel plans, and a general case of "please don't make me". I really never found that spot where I didn't hate it and it didn't wipe me out. I just don't think it is my thing, but I am going to start looking for what my thing might be.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Another year, another badge

Nix's middle school is doing a costume fundraiser again this year. This is always a problem. She can't wear her real Halloween costume to school, mainly because she uses a ballet recital dress and I don't want it ruined, but also because it wouldn't be very comfortable all day. I'm not buying a costume. Those things are expensive! So, we put on our thinking caps and come up with something creative that will work from what she already has.
Last year she was Lois Lane, and none of the kids knew who that was (I weep for the next generation). The good news is, all of the teachers knew and thought it was clever.
This year, we are going with a similar theme. She is going as Pepper Potts from Ironman (the movie, not the comic because Pepper was a little messed up in the comics). Since Nix is Still under 13, she hasn't seen Ironman yet, but she liked the idea.
Just like last year, I pieced together a graphic to make an ID badge. This time it is a Stark Industry employee badge. I found a couple of references online and then put my own little spin on it.

She'll be wearing a very professional looking dress and her hair pulled back into a bun to complete the look. I probably wouldn't send her door to door in it, but for a costume that didn't cost a dime, still meets dress code, and has a cool theme, I'm pleased.
On a side note, her real costume is Rapunzel from Tangled post haircut. She'll be handing out candy at the house using her frying pan as the candy bowl. JD is going out as a realistic Mario. He has overalls, a red shirt, white gloves, a mustache, and a great Mario hat. I'll post pictures up either here or Facebook after Halloween.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Late Night Laughs

This weekend we spent about 20 hours in the car. That is a lot of family togetherness, but the kids handled it surprisingly well. I think the excitement of getting to hold the newest member of the family (my new nephew) put us all in a haze of happiness. When we got home last night the haze started wearing off and the exhaustion set in. We put the kids to bed and had the most ridiculous conversation. I thought I'd let you in on a bit of it.

Me (speaking silly of someone from my childhood): She thought she was all that and a bag of chips, but I thought she was a few fries short of a Happy Meal. Remember when it was "a bag of cookies short of a Happy Meal"?
Rocky: Those were good cookies. Like animal cookies, but sweeter and shaped like Ronald McDonald's head
Me: What do we say now? "A few apple slices short" doesn't have the same ring.
Rocky: I miss those cookies
Somehow from there we digressed into talking about people who get tattoos in Hebrew or of a Chinese character, and how they'd likely never know if it was wrong. Then came the list of things it would be funny to substitute and how the people who originally spoke Hebrew believed a tattoo would send you to Hell. It is in Leviticus 19:28, which also topped our list of funny things to substitute. We tend to get just a wee bit twisted when we are exhausted.
Every minute we spent in the car was worth it, if for no other reason then to get this picture.

How adorable it this?! This is our next generation.
During the visit, we stayed at my parent's house. We were really only there long enough to sleep and eat breakfast each day. Before we left JD told my mom, "Thanks for letting us eat, sleep, and poop at your house." I couldn't have said it better myself. Well, I could have, but I was too busy shaking my head and trying not to laugh.

Friday, October 07, 2011

Are You Kidding Me?

I had the great joy of renewing my driver's license today. As with most simple tasks I have, it turned into an experience. Somehow I managed to miss the memo that the local DMV had moved. There was a lovely sign on the door of the old place telling me that had move and even what street they were off of, but no address. I guess it is a good thing I have a phone. After a couple of calls with Rocky, we figured out that it is back behind the new city aquatic center, because nothing goes together like giant swimming pools and driver safety (?). This new building is shiny and huge (serious tax dollars sunk into this one). When you walk in, there are people sitting waiting with clipboards and numbers, but nothing to tell you how to get a clipboard or a number. After walking around for a minute like an idiot, I gave up and asked someone how they managed to get a number. My favorite answer to the many, many people I saw asking this question was, "You stand there in the front until someone gets good and ready to talk to you and they will give you a number."
After I got my golden ticket, I filled out my paperwork and watched as other confused people came in. There got to be a pretty long line of people waiting to wait. A smoker sat down near me followed by a man who was wearing a LOT of cologne (insert standard rant about perfume). Just as my eyes started to water, my number got called. While the nice lady typed up my information, I causally mentioned that they might  consider some sort of sign to let people know how the waiting for a number thing works. She said, "We aren't allowed to have a sign." This was not exactly the answer I was expecting. I had to enquire further. They had a sign, but it wasn't "department regulation" so they had to take it down. I love a good mystery. This one took me all of about 2 minutes to figure out.
Not long ago, there was a big promotion about shorter wait times at the DMV. They made a pretty big deal out of how quickly they moved people through there. When I got my number there was a time code on it so that there was a computer record of my wait time. Do you get it yet? The wait time clock doesn't start until you get a number. If they put a "Wait here" sign up, then they have to count that in their average wait time numbers. They have cut your wait time in half not by being more efficient, but by making you spend half your time there waiting to wait!
Anyone else looking forward to the brilliant minds behind this taking over our health care?

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

Getting Uncomfortable

If there is one thing I have learned about what being a Christian involves it is that God has no intention of letting us stay in our comfort zones. On the one hand, I feel myself wanting to cry out, "Why?", but then again, what fun would life be if we were never pushed out of our box from time to time?
I like hanging out in the back of the room, observing all that is going on, working where needed, and in general, being behind the scene. From time to time, God seems to delight in shoving me up front. I find myself with the thought,  "Someone should really do something about that.", and before I know it, I am the someone trying to do the doing that needs done.
I've spent most of this week out of my box. I may have accidentally offered to help start a special needs program at our church, I'm in a running group, and then today called for a trip to the dentist with the kids. When I walked into the dentist office (my least favorite place to be) I saw this sign:

What are the odds? This point has been following me around for days. I feel like I have the God equivalent of the grim on me. It is starting to make me a little paranoid. On the upside, it has done wonders for my prayer life.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Feeling Poetic

It doesn't happen often, but from time to time I feel the urge to write somewhat cheesy poetry. Nothing calls for a poem that painfully rhymes like the birth of a baby, and I have just been gifted with my very first nephew. The poem may be silly, but it is also kind of sweet. I really wish I could draw so I could turn it into a board book. You can write just about anything in board book form and as long as it rhymes and the drawings are cute, it is brilliant. Any way, here is my poem written in honor of the birth of my nephew born 9-10-11 in Beijing, China.

When you were born it was both day and night,
With us in the darkness and you in the light.
We waited for days, expecting you here,
But you could not be rushed, you just wouldn’t appear.
So, we paced and we prayed, and even lost sleep,
Waiting and watching for you to make that first little peep.
Into this world you came with a scream.
It was far better than any of us would dare dream.
Though miles of ocean and even more land
Kept us apart, my love was instantly grand.
I could not wait until my arms would hold,
This tiny person, who was more precious than gold.
That day was, without question, certainly faithful.
You made me an aunt, and I am eternally grateful.  

Thursday, September 08, 2011

The Joy of Car Line

I've been going through old computer files and found something I wrote after a particularly bad day in the school car line. I started understanding how even the most even tempered person could get road rage. I thought I would post a couple of bits from it for fun.

At the beginning of the year the school gives you a magic claim check with a random number on it. It hangs on your rear view mirror and announces to the staff which child you are allowed to put in your car. Guard this with your life. Make sure there is one in every car you could possibly use to pick your child up. Laminate it, baby it, and treat it as gold. If you lose it you may never see your child again. Even if you child looks exactly like you and runs to your side saying,” Mommy! Mommy!” this is not enough. For safety purposes the school must assume that you and your husband entered into a nasty divorce that morning with him being awarded sole custody and you are now trying to kidnap your own children. It could happen. The only way to fix this problem is to bring with you 3 forms of ID, a DNA sample, and a notarized statement signed by your husband and a federal judge swearing that you do in fact have the legal right to claim your own child. If the colossal tragedy of losing the number card happens please do everyone in line behind you a favor and park your car and walk into the school to collect your child. It makes the line move so much faster and the strip search less embarrassing.

Later, I'll post tips on how to know when you should park your car and walk your child in.