Friday, March 02, 2012

The Mythological 8

I went shopping today for clothes, which is always frustrating. I want to meet the person they design clothes for these days. Apparently, she is a size 8, is 5'7", 135 pounds, a 34C with a 25 inch waste. Her shoes size is an 8 regular, and when it says "one sizes fits all" it means her. I have never met this alleged person and doubt I ever will.
The problem I am having right now is due to the assumption that anyone under a size 6 must want to dress like a teenager, and kind of a trashy one at that. I am down to Old Navy, because all of their clothes look the same regardless of size, and H&M because they still use European sizing. I am having to become a pro at layering. I want one store that is reasonably priced (sorry Ann Taylor), carries clothes smaller than a 6, and looks like something I should be wearing in this stage of life. It could be like Lane Bryant but for the oddly tiny.
I can see it now, one piece swimsuits, calf length skirts, and lower case v necks. It would be glorious. We could call it Dot because it is the opposite of Dash, and because I like to blame the entire Kardashian family for necklines dropping to where waistlines use to be and waistlines becoming hip lines. It might not be their fault, but whenever I get a chance blame the downfall of society on them, I take it.

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